


Oranges For Breakfast

by KatyaMorrigan



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Affection, Breakfast in Bed, Communication, F/M, Kaz doesn't know the meaning of the word 'subtle', Romantic Gestures, Understanding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-29
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:02:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27782680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatyaMorrigan/pseuds/KatyaMorrigan
Summary: After being gifted The Wraith, Inej tries to explain to Kaz what it is she needs in their relationship. Nothing extravagant, nothing huge. Just his time and his emotions. But Kaz finds that more than a little bit difficult, and it takes some communication and missed signals for him to finally get it right.
Relationships: Kaz Brekker/Inej Ghafa
Comments: 9
Kudos: 108





	Oranges For Breakfast

**Author's Note:**

> Day 29 of my NaNoWriMo writing challenge this year - one oneshot a day, every day for the whole of November. I'm following the SOFTober 2020 prompts by @wafflesandkruge on Instagram to give me some fluffy starting points for the coming month of fics.  
> The prompt for today was "sweet".  
> I hope you enjoy!

“Kaz,” Inej said as they stood at the docks, “have you ever considered simple gestures?”

He looked out across the harbour at the ship he had bought for her. They had just been inside it, and Inej had marvelled at the sheer volume of things that had already been fitted to the boat. Every room was fully furnished, there were cannons and cleaning materials out on the deck, and even a beautiful walnut wood and gold telescope in the captain’s office – presumably, hers. She didn’t quite know what to make of it, not least because Kaz absolutely wasn’t the person to give it as a gift. There had to be strings attached. But she had bargained with him and tried every method she could so that he would admit there was a debt to be paid or a favour she had to do, but there was nothing. Kaz Brekker had just bought her _The Wraith_ out of the debatable goodness of his heart.

And yet he couldn’t say that he loved her.

“Simple gestures?” he echoed, frowning at her.

“Yes. Something small and sweet, like telling me my hair looks nice, or just renting the berth of dock for me and letting me pay for the ship myself.”

“You know your hair looks nice, and where is the use in a berth with no ship?”

Inej rolled her eyes and looked back at her boat. Kaz was the smartest person she knew, and yet sometimes it was like his head was full of air. Salty sea air, permanently focused on making her wishes come true in only the grandest sense, with no perception of the other things she might want that did not consist of oceanic adventures. If he could just say something unexpectedly complimentary – which, for Kaz, would be any kind of inoffensive comment – then that would be enough for her. And now she had a boat. Which she definitely had to sail on at some point.

“I just mean that for all of this,” Inej gestured to _The Wraith_ , “you must have had to spend a lot of money.”

“You don’t need to concern yourself with the cost.”

“Of course, but what I’m saying is that if you want to show me you care, all I need is some of this.” Inej took his still ungloved hand, and squeezed gently before letting go. “I don’t need an entire navy for you to show me you care.”

“What about a small battalion?”

At least he had a sense of humour about it. Kaz was giving her a side-long look and smirking.

“I would be tempted,” Inej smiled. “How expensive are those?”

“I would have to sell the Slat and all of my shares in the House of the White Rose. Plus possibly my cane and my right lung.”

“Why the right one?”

“Your right lung is bigger than your left lung.”

“Why is—Never mind. I feel like you are intentionally misunderstanding me.”

“I understand you perfectly, Inej dear. I am merely electing to ignore you.”

She sighed and gave him a narrow-eyed look, which he returned with a brief smile. Kaz knew what he did for her was both unreasonably generous and exceptionally short-sighted. While she would never claim that the many great things Kaz had done for her weren’t touching, they didn’t mean as much to her as the miniscule glimpses at a kinder man that she had seen. Anyone could buy a girl a boat so that she could live her life as a pirate, destroying the people who had almost destroyed her. But then Inej thought of the way he had bandaged her shoulder in the Geldrenner despite everything that pushed him away from her; the moment in which he had looked at her on Vellgeluk Island; every single small instance in which he had proved his affections for her without having to bring out his wallet and use his status as a Barrel boss to show her that he cared. _The Wraith_ was wonderful, but it hadn’t meant as much as seeing him without his gloves, watching him reach for her hand and hold onto it with barely a shiver.

“I am still going to suggest that you don’t empty the Dregs’ coffers to pay for another gift to me for at least a year,” Inej said, “or you may have to face Captain Ghafa rather than your spider.”

“I haven’t met this captain yet, so I don’t know whether to fear for my life or not.”

Kaz’s smile flickered as Inej slid Sankta Alina from her sleeve in an instant and pressed the cold blade against the inside of his wrist.

“You’ve met her enough times to know better.”

Inej sheathed the knife once more and tilted her head as she looked up at Kaz. He exhaled noticeably, and Inej was pleased to see a flush appear on his neck.

“No more spending money on me,” she said gently.

“No more money,” Kaz acknowledged.

***

A week later, Inej made her way from the Van Eck mansion to the Slat, a newspaper clasped in her hand. There were very few that were published in Ketterdam, given its low literacy and high poverty rates, but those that remained after a few years of attempting to sell to the limited crowds mostly focused on the businesses in the city – including the brothels.

Inej reached the door to the Slat. It was still locked shut. Sighing quietly, Inej tucked the newspaper into her belt and made her way to the side of the building, scaling the drainpipe in less than a minute. She appeared at the topmost window without too much effort, jiggling the loose lock and climbing inside. Kaz was just buttoning up his shirt, and as usual, pretended not to be surprised at her arrival.

“Good morning,” he said. “I wasn’t expecting visitors today.”

“You haven’t read the paper this morning, I take it?” Inej said, panting a little. The stressor was less the climb up multiple stories of sheer wall, and more so the reason for her doing so.

“I stay away from the newspapers.”

“Well then. Let me read you the headline: _Leading brothel left empty as working girls disappear overnight.”_

“How intriguing.” Kaz’s tone inflected only slightly as he adjusted his tie and folded down his collar. “Perhaps the markets are moving away from sex work.”

“The Menagerie _, one of the most popular brothels along West Stave’s red light districts, found itself empty in recent days as every live-in working girl moved out overnight. Heleen Van Houden, the owner of the establishment, has stated that there were no notices of departure handed in, but that as she entered her room yesterday she found the indenture forms for every girl on her desk, filled in and paid for with no name given. It is unknown how these girls found themselves able to leave their posts at_ The Menagerie _so suddenly, but Van Houden suspects foul play. The Ketterdam Government has declined to comment on the matter.”_

Inej glared at Kaz.

“Foul play in Ketterdam could come from anywhere,” he said blithely. “There are more gangs than mediks here.”

“Strange how this gang chose to target _The Menagerie_ , though, don’t you think? And that rather than robbing the place or stealing the girls, they chose to fully pay their indentures, help them to leave, and do so entirely anonymously?”

“Perhaps a generous benefactor then,” Kaz replied. “There are strange men who decide they want live-in girls at their mansions. It wouldn’t be the first time.”

“I know you did it,” Inej said, rolling her eyes. “Stop pretending it wasn’t you.”

“Why the charade of curiosity, then?” Kaz inquired.

“I told you not to spend any more money on me.”

“The working girls of _The Menagerie_ are not you, Inej my dear. I can spend all the money I like on indentures without a dime of it going your way.”

She sighed and gave him a stern look. Kaz was as unreadable as ever, peering into his mirror as he ran a hand through his hair.

“You know what I meant.”

“What?” He turned to look at her. “Can I not be generous to another being?”

“You did this _for_ me, and this is exactly what I was talking about.”

“You should know better than to make a request of the Bastard of the Barrel without a contract disclosing all barred choices within it.”

“I shouldn’t have to ask my-- ask you not to do something simple and find that you’ve worked your way around it just to prove a point.” She had been about to say boyfriend, or partner, or lover, or any other term that they hadn’t pinned to their relationship. Inej knew as well as anyone that Kaz Brekker did not do emotional attachment, and it was ridiculous of her to attempt to label them as such.

“I don’t need to prove a point.” Kaz shrugged on his waistcoat. “I am simply going about business. Less competition for the House of the White Rose benefits the Crows. Maybe I was purely focused on finances. Maybe I could just have easily as chosen the _Sweet Shop,_ or _The Anvil.”_

“But you didn’t,” Inej persisted, “and you chose to destroy Tante Heleen’s livelihood in the full knowledge of what it would mean to me.”

“And what does it mean to you?”

“Everything.”

Inej choked on her words at the last second, and had to swallow hard to stop grateful tears from filling her eyes. It had been so long since she had cried, so long since she had shown anyone that kind of visceral vulnerability, and she knew that it wasn’t what Kaz needed to see.

“Then you can understand why I made the choice that I did,” Kaz said. His voice was uncharacteristically gentle, and he approached her as she blinked back her emotion, the buttons of his waistcoat still undone. “How could I not destroy Heleen?”

Inej just sighed and looked down. There was nothing to say. She was so overwhelmingly grateful to him for what he had done, and yet still frustrated at his inability to show the slightest hint of affection for her through any method other than grand gestures. But how could she continue to argue against what he had done, when he had saved her life yet again? _The Menagerie_ would undoubtedly close down, now. Tante Heleen would move on from Ketterdam. No more would the huge weighted shadow of her past lean over the streets she walked down every day.

Kaz reached forward with a gloved hand and wiped a stray tear from the corner of her eye. She looked up carefully, and saw his concerned expression.

“Why?” she asked. “Why can’t you just say you love me and be here with me and touch my face like that every day instead of bankrupting yourself to prove something?”

His expression hardened for a second before he inhaled slowly.

“If I had to pay the way for my feelings towards you so cheaply, it would take lifetimes to be able to show you it all.” Kaz’s gaze flickered to hers. “Doing it like this might give you some idea of everything I am unable to say and do.”

“But I don’t think you understand me,” Inej said softly. “I don’t want a ship on berth 22 to prove someone cares for me. I want a hand to hold under tables, someone to sleep beside every night. I don’t need vengeance. I need you to be here, every single day, giving me some small sign of it every time you feel it. There’s no price for what you feel, Kaz. Everything you give to me is paid forwards in how I feel for you.”

She reached up and laid a hand on his chest. There was a heart beating in here.

“My father would buy my mother geraniums because they were her favourite flower. He didn’t flatten a city to plant them there, just made sure there was a bunch on the table every time his love wasn’t showing so clearly. That’s all I need from you.”

Kaz met her eye and nodded slowly.

“It’s harder for me to… to be here so honestly in front of you,” he admitted. “You feel things so openly. I cannot love so honestly. It is easy to give you great things because it feels like compensation for all of the little things I cannot do.”

“But what about the things you can do?” Inej smiled softly at him, and he smiled back. “Just because you can’t hold my hand all of the time doesn’t mean you can’t sit beside me when we eat, or pass me my knives when I clean them. There are a million ways you can love me that don’t hurt and don’t cost the earth.”

“I would pay that if it would make you happy, you know,” Kaz said, and Inej chuckled quietly.

“What would make me happy is something small and sweet.”

“Kaz Brekker is going to attempt something small and sweet for you then, my dear.” He raised an eyebrow at his own words, and she chuckled again in response.

“Thank you.”

***

That conversation stuck in Inej’s mind for the rest of the week as she continued her work for the Dregs. Kaz was a little more attentive to her; quicker to glance at her in conversation, quicker to offer a chair when meetings began, quicker to ask if she was okay when a stake-out ended. It was unusual, and admittedly Inej found it a little uncomfortable at first to have Kaz caring for her so openly, but she knew how hard he was trying, and that was what she really wanted. That effort told her all that she needed to know.

Nearly two weeks after their conversation, Inej was awoken from her room in the Van Eck mansion by a knock at the door. Wylan and Jesper never disturbed her in the mornings, so she assumed it must be a member of staff coming to clean while she was working. They must not have realised that she wasn’t out by eight on weekends.

“Occupied,” she said as clearly as she could while still half asleep. Inej prepared to put her head back down on the pillow and sleep once more, but the handle of the door turned and she sat upright, pulling back the curtain of her four-poster and preparing to talk again with the staff.

But the person walking into her room was not one of the cleaners or butlers or cooks. It was Kaz. And he was carrying a tray. Inej pulled back the curtain more as he approached, and she saw that he was carrying her breakfast up for her – two slices of toast and an orange already peeled and split into segments on a white plate. In a small copper jug was a single purple geranium.

“Good morning, dear,” he said, putting the tray on her nightstand and sitting on the edge of the bed.

“What’s this?” Inej asked, her voice still low from sleep and now whispering from eagerness.

“Wylan and Jesper told me that you sleep in on weekends,” he explained, “so I thought you might find it sweetly simple for me to bring your breakfast up to you.”

Kaz’s face was as unemotional as ever, but Inej could see his need to please her in the way his brow was slightly furrowed as she pulled back the duvet and sat cross-legged on the bare mattress.

“You brought me breakfast in bed?” she said, delighted. Kaz nodded once.

“It would appear that I have.”

Inej laughed with pure happiness and leaned forwards, pulling Kaz into a tight hug. He recoiled slightly in surprised and adjusted her grip around his chest, but quickly wrapped his arms around her too. She heard him inhale deeply as his nose found the crook of her neck, still covered by the high collar of her nightshirt, and sighed in his arms.

When they let go of each other, both were wearing a similarly soft expression, and Inej laughed again.

“Who are you and what have you done with Kaz Brekker?” she said.

“I should worry more about the podge charged with impersonating me,” he replied. “He must have committed a number of sins to have to do such a thing.”

She giggled and reached for the plate, biting into the honey-soaked toast and sighing again happily. Kaz sat further back on the bed, leaning on his elbows as they chatted quietly. Inej felt as though she must still be asleep. Kaz was in her room, on her bed, delivering her breakfast with a flower she had mentioned to him weeks ago on the tray as well. He was talking to her without any of the residual stiffness that still lay in their interactions, casually mentioning how nice she looked in one of Jesper’s oversized shirts and complimenting her braid.

Inej finished her toast and took the plate of orange segments into her lap. The small strings of pith that lined the edge of the fruit had been carefully picked off, and she felt a surge of affection on top of all that she already felt at the sight of it.

“Would you like a piece?” she asked, holding them out to Kaz. He smiled and took one, biting into it with a careful hand around his mouth to catch the juice. Inej did the same, and they ate it in silence, savouring the sweetness and the company that it was shared in.

When they had finished eating, Inej reached out for Kaz’s gloved hand. He took it immediately.

“Thank you so much for this,” she said with a warm voice. “I can’t tell you how much it means.”

“Enough to forgive me for all the useless gestures I have made in the past?” Kaz said ruefully. Inej shook her head.

“They weren’t useless at all. I’m still so grateful for the boat, and for _The Menagerie_ being destroyed, and for my indenture, oh Saints. Everything you’ve ever done for me, I’m grateful for. But I’m even happier now that you know the best ways to make me happy don’t take so much of your time and effort. Just a little more feeling than you’re used to.”

Kaz chuckled and squeezed her hand.

“I can sacrifice some of my pride and guilt in order to make you as happy as you have been this morning, every single day.”

And that was all Inej needed to hear.

**Author's Note:**

> Wow, this took way more effort than I was expecting, but I really hope it's paid off. I loved this concept, of them communicating their feelings and needs in their relationship, and it taking a little bit of time for them to get it right. Leigh Bardugo wrote some amazing flawed characters, and I think that that's one of the main things I love preserving in the writing I do around what she created. 
> 
> I hope that you enjoyed this little fluffy piece with them navigating love languages in a more personal way, and that you have enjoyed the past month of fics! This is my last SoC one, as tomorrow's prompt is "blanket" and will be based on Loveless by Alice Oseman, so I want to say thank you very much to everyone who has been reading these as I posted them for all the lovely comments and frequent kudos. This has been wonderful, and I will definitely endeavour to keep posting fics in the future - just not for a little bit!  
> All my love.


End file.
